Knowing and understanding what not to say or do to mentally abused people is not really that tough. You might have heard people giving unsolicited advice on how to behave to an emotional abuse survivor but we all know the truth lies somewhere else. Ask the survivors, how they have been made a center of a joke among relatives or some close people which they didn't mean it. Emotional abuse has never been discussed openly be it in TV shows or in Local newspapers. The health section is being read by senior citizens mostly or people who only know how to use youtube just to watch funny short videos. It is important to reach out to the people who do not wake up to social media to read and learn. People whose only source of entertainment is TV and its daily soaps. They need to unlearn so many things because many times they end up saying or doing terrible things to the mentally abused people which they never meant. This is for those who want to unlearn their unintentional humiliative behavior.
Why didn't you speak up
This is one of those worst things you shouldn't be saying to emotionally abused people. Asking them why didn't they raise their voice when they were in that situation needs a serious discussion. You can never know in what circumstances the survivors were and how they managed to escape.
Did you talk to your parents?
Not everyone's parents are aware of these things. In India, most parents don't even know about the LGBTQ+ communities existence. Parents who think gay-lesbian marriage is a curse, how can you expect them to understand their mental abuse?
Are you sure this happened?
You should immediately stop yourself or the family members from saying this to someone who has been mentally abused throughout their life. I know raising issues and talking about them in Indian homes is a deadly combination of how to put yourself in danger, but it will not go in vain if your continuously doing it so. So save someone by objecting to humiliative behaviors.
Forget and restart
You can not force someone who is mentally abused or be anyone. To move on people try to seek professional help which mostly is unaffordable for middle-class people. Everyone can take a different amount of time and the healing process to restart afresh but this doesn't allow you to give examples of them in front of any survivor you meet. And what you shouldn't be saying to emotionally abused people is needed to learn asap.
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