Finding the right person versus finding the perfect person to get married to hasn't been out of the spotlight. The idea behind perfectionism varies from person to person and never stops attacking one another's encapsulated traits. When I was in college, my friends would tell me to find the Prince charming and ask me not to settle for less, my parents would decide whom I shouldn't be with because that person lacks something out of the preferred check boxes of my parents. I never made a list of what I wanted from the guy of my dreams.
If you would ask me what my dreams looked like? I would definitely feel helpless because I can not bind those feelings into words.
When I met this guy at my workplace who ticked off all the traits of my parents including of my friends ( mmm hmm, he was tall and handsome) basically the 'Perfect' guy, we broke up after a few months of dating, here's why?
I never wanted 'Perfection'
If you would look around every corner of my room, you would find a book or maybe some handwritten notes because I love to read, I never throw a piece of paper without reading it. I leave my favorite bookmark at the table sometimes, because it reminds me of my favorite constellation when the weather is cloudy. When I invited him over for lunch, he started keeping things in 'order', I asked him to leave things in their states but no. And it kept happening which made me really uncomfortable being around him.
I saw things in him that other's partners have
Scrolling social media we don't realize what are we taking from others and the number is too large to figure out. Seeing people getting married to their love of life and reading what they saw in their partners to mark them as a 'Perfect' guy made me so attentive that I misunderstood those qualities with what I wanted. When I met him, he looked like the 'Perfect' partner, he was sweet, and he treated me right but there was no chemistry between us.
Him being a blind worshipper of elders
This is when I gave my messed thought a final shape, saying no to him, to our relationship. Respecting seniors is a different thing from blindly nodding your head to every opinion. On our office's new year's evening, we joined the party together. Between the light fun, a senior staff of the office questioned my lifestyle, and my way of replying to others on social media. I looked at my 'Perfect' guy and saw him smiling and shaking his head affirmatively. Later that evening when I asked him the reason, he said he did not want to be rude to him because he is senior and I should ignore him too.
Well, we respectfully parted ways after then and I took my time to differentiate things from others' POV. It did help me a lot not only in meeting new guys but in making new friends too.
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